The Beach

So I walk down 16th Street to the junction of Collins Avenue and access the sands using the public footpath to the right of the Loews Hotel. It has a distinctive little art deco tower on the top so it makes a good reference point when I wander off piste along the shore.

The beach was pretty quiet today so I found a remote spot got undressed and lay on my towel. I have been sunbathing without a top as I dont want to have tan lines. I am really not an exhibitionist at all, infact I kind of don't like my body or indeed anyone elses for that matter. When I say I don't like my body I mean I really appreciate how strong and healthy I am, how much energy I have and how lucky I am that it has held up in the face of the abuse I used to put it through. I just mean that I am not like some total no inhibitions kid, not at all.  I am painfully aware of every blemish, stretch mark and bit of cellulite and have always wished I had some kind of perfect dolls body made from plastic rather than flesh.

The strange thing is that although in many ways Americans seem to have a kind of hoochy 'Hey Lady - Suck My Dick' sexuality I havn't seen another woman topless since I have been here. I actually had to ask one of the attendants who run the chair hire stations if it was ok to be topless. It's very odd, when I go sunbathing in the open air pool in Covent Garden it's like one g-string between three.

Of course this being the case in Miami, no matter how far away from others I lay, the minute I take my top off I am on the prefered route to practically everywhere. It's deeply bloody annoying, I actually heard one guy come over and say Hi, I didn't even open my eyes. I was very near to telling him to F*** Off but luckily he went away. American's really don't swear, you would never hear the F word unless you were talking to me and the C word, another favourite of mine would fell a truck stop hooker. I feel like a loaded gun.