Breakfast

Sitting on the step feeding Stray Cat this morning, I need to get the cats some more biscuits. They sell just massive containers of it now in Publix I am not sure I could carry it home in the heat. I have attracted a new pet in the form of a Mosquito that has eaten me during the night. I hope he is drunk on my blood because if I see him I am going to kill him. J'accuse Richard of allowing him in last night while smoking on the porch like Big Daddy Clampit.

That better not be a rain cloud

All I have to do is get myself stuck in a contained environment with a whole lot of other people and I become entirely eugenicist if not xenophobic.  I am writing this on BA209 London to Miami. The food they have the audacity to serve wouldn’t get handed out in Dade County. Most of the other passengers are elderly, infirm or unwashed with an uncanny ability to produce mucous.  The lengths I have to go to in order to escape the British winter. There were 20 wheel chairs and assistants waiting for plane in Miami. I am not joking when I tell you I was one of the few people able to leave the plane totally unassisted. I guess people come here to die ,which is appealing enough but can they not just settle down and await their fate? 

Bagel, Sliced & Grilled

I took my hatred across the road to the bagel shop to appease it with some carbohydrates. I had the most divine Pumpernickel toasted bagel with cream cheese. I think Pumpernickel might be the same thing as Rye. It is the same colour and tastes of caraway seeds. I really like it. I spotted a crazy woman with really bad surgery - like a cut / paste/ stretch and flat iron job. One of the true wonders of American tourism is these chance sightings of really messy facelifts. They are actually more and more rare as the owners are dying out of old age and surgery has come on quite a bit since the 1970's. While it is on one level a human tragedy I can't help but wonder how bad the person looked in the first place if the abomination before me is the 'improvement'.

David's Cuban Cafe

I stopped at Davids on 11th and Collins on the way home. Cuban coffee is made like expresso with sugar, they put a couple of teaspoons of sugar in each tiny cup. It tastes amazing actually but it is not inline with my weight loss goals to be wasting carbs like this. The girls (figures like bulldogs) do not approve of people asking for no sugar, one is viewed with deep suspicion on this account.

It's that time again

Here is my nightly picture of Richards bed with me not in it. Not in it because I am pacing around the apartment awake, unable to sleep. Its 7.13 in London so if I were at home I would be awake but the thing is I would have also been asleep. My friends have been helpful on the subject of insomnia, one tells me to go jogging, obviously a new friend since anyone who had known me very long would know I neither possess running shoes or the inclination to run anywhere. Besides which its hot here, running in 80 degree heat is tantamount to self harm. I practically pass out from heat stroke waiting for the lights to change when I am crossing the road. Another said I should masturbate before trying to get to sleep to release dopameine. Thank you for that tip, I would never have thought of that. I didn't know it was called dopameine though.

Restless

I used to be able to sleep. In London with a bedroom over looking and more to the point over hearing Charing Cross Road, I sleep 8 or 9 hours a night. In Miami, in silence I can hardly sleep at all.

This better work

Of course you can't buy anything as civilised as Yakult here, so I had to trapse 5 blocks in brutal 90 degree conditions to Wholefoods. I found this coconut probiotic drink which tastes rank enough for me to feel that it might do the trick.  

Breakfast

Richard and I went to Ballans on Lincoln Road for breakfast. Its the same Ballans that we have in London, owned by the same people. Richard made us sit inside in subzero air conditioning it was hideously cold and about 70 degrees outside. Like a fool I ate toast and eggs and I have been in agony ever since. I hate serious food, I can't digest it. I have been living on salad and fruit here its so much easier. Richard says I have an eating disorder I say I am intolerant of a few different food groups.

I can't face another day of this hell

I am staying home in the air conditioned apartment. I need a day out of the sun. I will emerge at dusk.