It's Not Over Till It's Over

I was thinking about flying home and I suddenly felt the urge to email my friend and leave instructions on how to manage my paultry affairs if I die. It is a little odd that I all of a sudden had a flash of my own mortality, since I have no phobia of flying am not prone to premonitions and have generally lived life as though I were bullet proof. I was thinking about my son, how awful it would be for him to be left alone and confused at his age, he is now the same age as I was when it happened to me.

Things I have done today. A pictorial review

I drank coffee (3 cups)

Ate fruit salad for breakfast

Fed stray cat

Did Dr Hauschka facial and wrote reviews of all the products for Jess

Had late lunch at Lime (Taco Salad)

Drank coconut water

Just sometimes I'm wondering why shouldn't I leave?

Two more sleeps in Miami. I feel pretty excited to be going home but the thought of travel makes me nervous. Also the thought of returning to my life of responsibility (not that I have ever taken any) doesn't thrill me either.

My concerns in no particular order.

• What if its raining and stormy and the plane is delayed or cancelled?
• What if Virgin are even worse than they were on the way here?
• It will be cold and overcast at Heathrow
• The flat will be a mess
• I have to train Stella to hunt and kill
• I have to get a new income stream
• I need to sort out my appearance

I lack strength and direction.

Lunch

I had a Reece Peanut Butter Cup shake for lunch. A meal in a glass. I am really worried about all the fattening food I have consumed on this trip. When Richard leaves tomorrow I am detoxing - fruit and salad only.
A list of things that I enjoyed but kind of regret:

• Eggs on Toast from Ballans twice
• Cheese Fries from Shake Shack twice
• Peanut Butter Cake (not nice) from Ice Box
• Coconut chocolate cake (fabulous) from Ice Box
• Reece Pieces Shake
• Dove Bar (only decent chocolate bar in US)
• Jelly Beans (white flavours only)

That's kind of it but it feels like more somehow.

Handwashing

Even laundry looks good here, I think its the light. I am starting to think about all the things I need to do before I go home. I am projecting. I will be in London this time next week.

So much to do today. Part 1

Smell the flowers

So much to do today. Part 2

Feed cat

So much to do today. Part 3

Wash the dishes, need to talk to Richard about getting a dishwasher...

So much to do today. Part 4

Handwashing. I don't have that much laundry to do actually. I tend to wear the same stuff to the beach everyday and hang out in a slip in the house. As usual I have brought a suitcase of clothes that I could have left at home. I like to take my clothes on holiday its good for them to get out of London.

So much to do today. Part 5

Grocery shopping - healthy food only today. Check out the titchy tomato's called grape tomato's.

So much to do today. Part 6

Had to drag a sack of laundry like a 7 dwarf almost half a block to the laundromatt on 15th Street. Richard left me a ton of towels and bedding to do. I mean all you have to do is stay rent free in someones home for 3 weeks and they expect you to help out - what's with that? Anyway I dragged the stuff there and the lazy bitch who was supposed to do the service wash said '3 days'! Richard will be here on Friday so I was forced into servitude and had to do it myself. Exhausting - this is supposed to be a holiday.